Uni-sex names. Bet anyone with one just cringed. There are so many cons to them it can be hard to think about.
Therefore during my time growing up I became determined that even some of the biggest downsides can be taken advantage of.
1.) Names Spelled Incorrectly
Overreacting to said offense can be quite easy. I’ve watched my sibling respond in such a way ever since they learned how to spell it on their own. Sometimes the mistake is minor— many uni-sex names may have gender variations such as Toni and Tony or Artemis or Artemus. But as I have discovered over the years is a great opportunity for ironic flippancy!! >:)
Polite corrections or even jokes tend to go over well.
2.) Anything With Your Name…
Vacations and long car rides are often a time to buy souvenirs. Items with your name tends to be an all time favorite! But when they always turn up with the gender-base opposite of the one you’re looking for it becomes frustrating. I myself often fall victim to such occurrences. Such is the whimsy of pompous novelty items.
3.) Gender Switch
Before I go on I only thought it right to acknowledge those less fortunate than us. To every group of people out there using the same name in a workplace, school or social group. Skip to number five for advice. To the people who only find those with the matching name to be of the opposite gender. Don’t feel down! Now you just have an excuse to socialize. Being the only girl to share a name with a group of guys or a guy sharing a name with girls can be rough. (Trust me I know.) At least you can always look original. Lastly may we share a moment of silence for every boy named Ashley: your time will come again. 🙏
4.) You talking to me?
Having a uni-sex name can increase the chances of you sharing a name with one or more people. Such instances can quickly escalate into a cacophony of: “Who me,” “are you talking to me” or a total lack of response altogether. To run on optimal amounts of personal amusement all must A.) Fail to respond or B.) Respond in unison. Nothing makes the offender more uncomfortable.
5.) Finding Other Yous
In high school I had the pleasure of sharing my name with four other individuals. We often rode the same bus or would end up in classes together. At which point we would sit side by side to mess with the teachers and our fellow students. Our office once made the grievous decision to call for one of my fellow ‘Yous’ to be called to the office. When a last name or specification was never made all five of us promptly appeared at the office. I have never terrified an office attendant more than when me and my other mes showed up. We must have looked something like those taken over in ‘Invasion of the Body-Snatchers.’
That mistake was sadly never repeated. Much to my disappointment. I felt very similar to John Hammond in Jurassic Park when he sees all his clones. “Hi John.” “Oh hi John!” “Nice to see you John.”
In such cases here are some pro tips to maximize confusions of those who are ‘Not You.’
A.) Make a plan for when your name is used.
B.) When your name is used non-specifically all of you must show up or respond.
C.) Refuse to answer a direct question until a specific ‘You’ is identified.
D.) Resistance is futile. We are Borg. We are one.
When you have multiples use it to your advantage. When together do not question it.
Maverick Mosley Blogs 